http://the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com/ ([identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com) wrote in [community profile] jla_watchtower2012-03-01 12:21 pm
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Sanity Clause

The phone rings loudly, echoing through the tiny apartment.

"Cheeks, can you get that?" comes the shouted response from the green-suited figure in the kitchen, busily folding dishtowels into the shapes of various superhero insignias.
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[identity profile] jla-extras.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:34 pm (UTC)(link)
The white-bearded man in the red suit sits dejectedly on a bench - looking surprisingly comfortable despite the layers of clothing he's wearing. He looks up as Ambush Bug approaches.

"Irwin."

[identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:36 pm (UTC)(link)
"Well, well, well. Let me guess - got a little too jolly with the ho-ho-hos?"

Ambush Bug snickers at his own joke.

"You do look like a pretty sad sight here with the fancy boot and belts, the hat, and the.. "

He peers more closely at the figure's hands.

"Green gloves?? That must mean.."

[identity profile] jla-extras.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:38 pm (UTC)(link)
He holds up his green-mittened hands and nods solemnly.

"That's right, Irwin. I'm Kris Kring-L, Santa Claus of Earth Two."

[identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:41 pm (UTC)(link)
Ambush Bug's jaw drops for a second, but he quickly recovers.

"Well, hey, how're you doing, man? I haven't seen you since that whole Christmas on Infinite Earths thing! I remember those walls of white, consuming whole universes at the Santa-Monitor's behest. Come to think of it, Earth Three must still be snowed in - haven't heard from my evil counterpart Assassin Bug in ages."

[identity profile] jla-extras.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
Kring-L bites his lip, looking away for a moment - unable to bring himself to correct Ambush Bug's supposition with the truth just now.

"So, listen.. I need your help, Irwin."

[identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:45 pm (UTC)(link)
"Oh, sure! Anything I can do, just ask! What is it, some horrible assault against the Yuletide from a multi-dimensional threat? An Infinite, or perhaps Final, Christmas?"

Ambush Bug's gaze drifts upward as he puffs out his chest, envisioning himself as the champion of Christmas.

[identity profile] jla-extras.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
Santa waves his hands to try and prevent Ambush Bug from raising his hopes any higher.

"No, no. Nothing like that. I .. I just need some bail money. I can pay you back once I get back to the South Pole*."

* Editor's note : unlike the Santa Claus of Earth One, the Santa of Earth Two built his toy factory of Solitude in the Antarctic!

[identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Ambush Bug is immediately and visibly crestfallen.

"Seriously, that's it? Bail money? Well, sure, I guess. What'd they nail you for, anyways?"

[identity profile] jla-extras.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Santa shrugs his shoulders, the sad gesture merely causing his belly to shake like a cupful of jelly.

"Apparently, the RIAA really, really frowns on music sharing across dimensional or vibrational boundaries."

[identity profile] the-ambush-bug.livejournal.com 2012-03-01 05:56 pm (UTC)(link)
"Wow. Well, I'll go bail you out - but hey, one thing. Even though its March, if anybody asks - tell them I saved Christmas."
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